by judy tiernan
(urbandaale, iowa)


I can't buy your book today because I don't have any money. But I really need help. My 11 year old female cat won't leave the bedroom.

I have a 4 year old male and whenever she goes into the living room, he chases her back into the bedroom. She has been in the bedroom for a whole year! I'm afraid she will spend the rest of her life confined to the bedroom and it is breaking my heart. She absolutely hates the boy cat. I don't know what to do.

Thank You, Kate!


Hi Judy
Sadly this can often happen when a new cat comes to live in the home. Some cats can adapt and get used to another cat, others will defend their territory and make sure that the new cat knows there place. But in this case it sounds like your cat is quite prepared to allow the other cat to have all the territory to himself.

Unfortunately this is her decision and you can't fight her corner for her as it wee.

All i can suggest is that you may want to try and help your cats to relax and be a little more chilled out with each other by using some of the cat sprays and medications available. They may help your cats to get along a little better and allow your female cat to come out from her hiding place. One spray is called felaway i know, other medications are available and some are mentioned on my page here


I assume both cats are spayed / neutered. If not then this will also be increasing the tensions between them.

You could also try some new and stimulating toys for your older cat. This will help to distract her from any anxieties she may be having and this in turn may help her to loose some fear.

I'm afraid there is no one easy answer to this. you will simply have to try and re build her confidence and help reduce tensions in the home.

best wishes kate

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