by sheryl dean
(campbell california)
i have a year old cat. i was never a cat lover. i have always been a dog person. until i moved in for a while with my mom. my sister had moved out of state and left her cat there. i tried everything i knew to discourage this pesty cat from being around me. but he would not listen. and i started to warm up to him. after 5 years, at the age of 17, we decided to put him down, because he was in pain a lot. we had been manually hydrating him with an iv on and off for a year. let me tell you something. i have been through a lot in my life, but i have never, ever experienced the horrible gut wrenching agony, that i felt when i came home that night, and he wasnt there. i was absolutely hysterical and i cried for days. i have never felt such grief in my life. i am barely able to keep from crying now. i realized after all of that, that he had been my friend. regardless of what i "thought", he had made a place in my heart for himself, and he was my friend no matter what i did. he was there. i only wish now that i hadnt spent so much time trying to shoo him away from me. i wish i had shown him the love that he so badly wanted to share with me. anyway, i digress. i have a question in the present day world. finally, after 2 years had passed, i decided i wanted to have my very own kitty. i looked around, but i coulndt find one i liked. then one day a friend of my sisters had a kitty that she couldnt keep and i said i would take him. he was 4 months old and a holy terror. he is a year old and hasnt changes a bit, even after i had him neutered. he is me in a male cats body. i love him more than i can ever relate here. my question is...i live in a very nice place with a small backyard area. i want him to be able to go outside. he loves it out there. but twice, he has found a way to scale the fence to get out. both times i thought i was going to have a heart attack. there are big dogs around us, and a good amount of traffic. i managed to get him back in both times. now i dont want to let him out at all. we have 2 other cats here that go outside, but they have absolutely no desire to leave the safety of the yard. mine, on the other had, begins searching for ways out of the yard, the minute i let him out there. he wants to hunt and be like a wild cat. i feel like its cruel to keep him indoors all the time. we have tried
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