My cat hates me since I came home from hospital

by Rika
(Kitimat BC., Canada)

Daisy and Creeper

Daisy and Creeper

I am so very sad, I have 3 cats but my Daisy, a little lilac point Siamese, and I were so very close, I mean we did everything togetheer, she was always by my side she owned my bed if another cat even looked at it they got chased away, we were just the closest happiest companions and now she completely hates me.

I had to go into hospital for 2 months, when I came home she hardly acknowledged me which shocked me. everyday I've made many attemps to pat her brush her play with her, and she honestly wants nothing to do with me, she runs away from me, she won't even let me pat her, this breaks my heart like you have no idea. I love Daisy so much, and to not wake up in the middle of the night and not see her with me in bed or not have her run up to me when I wake up.. anything.
It's been over 2 months now and there's been no change at all, and I'm so scared she's never going to be the Daisy I once knew.
Please can you help me? I'm devastated, and at a complete loss at what to do.
I have one other Siamese she's quite old and keeps to herself, and I have a 4 year old Tonk. and both of them have not done anything different, they're the same. Oh I should mention Daisy is a year and a half in age.
If I could get some suggestions, ideas, anything I would so very grateful!
Please any suggestion is not too small, send me any and all. thank you.

Thank you so much,

Rika

Answer by KAte
Hi let me say this is a common problem for these circumstances. Basically it is based around fear. You went away, this would have been upsetting and possibly frightening for your cat, when yo came back it is likely that you smelt differently this is also another thing which can cause fear, you may even be acting slightly differently due to your illness etc. All of these things are causes for a cat to react with fear.

So it is not that your cat hates you, no it is more likely that she is fearful and unsure of you.

I suggest that you practice some of the bonding methods described on this page here
https://www.our-happy-cat.com/new-cat.html


take it slow but i'm sure that over a little time she will relax around you.

best wishes Kate

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DESPERATE HELP :(
by: Anonymous

ok so basically I bought an oriental cat...same issue...kindof. I read the link but it does not refer to my situation. Ok the cat is about 6 months old, he came to me when i went to purchase a baby kitten and from then on i decided to buy him and the owner said it was ok. The cat is a male oriental and he is very social...he was fine when I got him a week ago but now seems less interested in me....he likes my partner and parents more than me and goes to them more when im the one who always calls him, feeds him and plays with him. He even sleeps on my partners bed but now im at my moms house and he sleeps with me. my bfs cousins came down on the weekend and tormented the poor thing...one of them is an older male and he yelled at the cat a few times scaring him into a corner until i told him to leave the room. now my kitty plays with me but doesnt lay with me or rub up on me or anything i have to go to the cat for attention now. he still follows me and hangs in the same room wherever i go BUT doesnt seem to want to sit or lay on my lap or give me attention like he used to. the cat even used to cry when i left the room and now he doesnt. he used to cry for attention whenever I was focussing on something else but now he doesnt. he also bites me gently when i play with him (I fling a ball on string around) and pushes my hand away with his legs....does he hate me or is this just play? or is this that he doesnt like me touching him when i play with him?

please help x

Answer by KAte
Hi
er well what can I say, you can't chose how your cat interacts with you its up to them. Also cats do change their behavior over time. I have two male cats who I have had since they were 4 months old. Now they are 1 and a half and most of the behaviors they had as kittens has changed. i.e they dont want to sit on laps any more, they play less often with me, they go out more, they sleep more etc etc. Its all part of growing up and adapting to their surroundings.

Your kitten may still be finding his feet and place in the home, it is very unlikley that he hates you, cat's rarely have that kind of emotion anyway, its more likely that he is feeling a little unsure of his surroundings and so is a little of handish until he is more confident.

Give him time and don't try to force him to do any thing, they will come to you when they feel safe and sure.

best wishes Kate

Thank you Kate
by: Rika

Thank you so much Kate,
you've helped me a lot! and I'm going to go to that webpage you've suggested as well.


You've given me hope <3
Thank you again.

Rika

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