My cat is no longer our pet!!

by Amy Farrar
(Bournemoth, England)

Hi, i hope you can help because we've kind of given up hope.

We have a 2 year old ginger male who up until the last few months was extremely playful and loving and had an annoying habit of suckling on our clothes.

We moved him into our new home in October of last year and he's been fine up until about three months ago when we house sitted for a friend who has students and only came home briefly to feed him and our two other cats in the evening.

We then went on holiday for a week a couple of weeks later and a friend stayed at our house to feed them while we were away.

Since then his behavior changed drastically. He became very distant and no longer came over for cuddles or his usual suckling behavior. He then started disappearing all day long and coming back briefly for food. We put a tag on him with our address and number to make sure that neighbors know he's ours and one of them actually came round to speak to us saying our cat has been going to his house every day and sleeping on his sofa as he leaves his door open during the day.

He says he doesn't feed him however.
The pattern has now got a lot worse as he comes home every 2 - 3 days has a quick bite to eat and disappears straight away.

We've tried to keep him in for a few days to get him back into the habit of realizing he's at home and i've currently got him in the lounge with me as i've closed off his exit out the house, but the crying and meowing is unbelievable. He's just not happy
being with us in our home and i cant understand why.

The other cats ignore him now whereas before they used to play and groom each other.

Any ideas about what's happened to him??

Kind regards


Hi Amy
firstly you did not mention if he is neutered or not. If not then this would go some way to explaining his behavior.

If he is then all I can assume is that he is no longer happy in the home. Now this could be for several reasons. As cats get older they do go through different stages of behavior. i know my two 2 year old cats have. It may simply be a phase in other words.

Or the cat has decided that he is much happier being the only cat in his home and so has found somewhere else where he can have his own territory.

When I was a child we had a female cat who moved home away from us when we got a new kitten. she put up with for about a year and then decided enough was enough and found another family to take her in. We had to go with it in the end and gave the new owners our blessing.

So you have a few options. If your cat is not neutered then having this done may help to calm him down and reduce his wanderlust.

If his weight remains the same then all you can do is to create a feeding routine for him so that over time he can get used these times and feel more confident about when he gets fed and how much, his appetite will also adjust over time as his tummy gets used to his new food levels,

best wishes kate

Comments for My cat is no longer our pet!!

Click here to add your own comments

by: Anonymous

I have 2 rescue cats that had never been outside before. The girl wasn't keen on going out but now is out all the time, comes in for food twice a day, then runs straight out. Bit annoyed with her but happy she's having fun. I live between a lot of parks, I hope she's enjoying her freedom.

Click here to add your own comments

Return to Cat Questions.

I'd love to hear what you think of this page or my site. Let me know if you like what you have read or if it has helped you with a problem.

It's easy to do just leave a comment in the box below and click the like / share or +1 to let others know about my site. Thank You It really is most appreciated.

Enjoy this page? Please pay it forward. Here's how...

Would you prefer to share this page with others by linking to it?

  1. Click on the HTML link code below.
  2. Copy and paste it, adding a note of your own, into your blog, a Web page, forums, a blog comment, your Facebook account, or anywhere that someone would find this page valuable.